Okay, so this might get a bit disgusting. Do I care? Obviously not.

[dizmo]

Okay. So I was pondering the feminine hygiene product line known as Tampax Pearl. (No, I don't know why, either. Whatever.)

So, I was thinking. Pearl, huh? Does that imply that my nether regions are an oyster?

After a bit of thought, I determined that it might not be such a bad analogy, especially given the product in question. I mean, it does take a foreign object and coat it in layers of secretions.

... But the day that they mass-produce jewelry out of strings of used tampons is the day I pray for death.

Comments

[kittiec.livejournal.com]

LOL! I needed this laugh. Thanks. :)

[dizmo]

Glad to be of service!

[madame-enjolras.livejournal.com]

...you are on so much crack. XD And that would be insanely gross.

[dizmo]

It WOULD be. I mean EW.

[staringgoldfish.livejournal.com]

Why would that even occur to you? Everyone knows it's a clam, not an oyster.

[dizmo]

Yeah, yeah. But clams don't produce pearls.

Therefore.